Tuesday, 16 July 2013

A letter to explain (Letters to)


Before you come into my house, please let me explain. I was just in the middle of doing the dishes...that's why there are dirty plates on the kitchen sides. Oh and please excuse the floors, I was planning to sweep them later today.
Please take a seat and I'll get you a drink...I'm afraid I don't have much at the moment, the shopping is being delivered tomorrow.
I know my hair is a mess, and I probably have banana mashed into my leggings...the baby just had his lunch, I don't usually look this unkempt. Please relax on the sofa, I'll just clear these empty mugs away, oh and you don't mind if I quickly put a load of washing on do you?

Please let me explain, as I feel I must.

I feel I must.

Every day my mouth pours out explanations and excuses for one thing or another. The order of my home, my appearance, the tidiness of my car, why my baby is crying and doesn't want you to cuddle him. But this is my home, and you are welcome to enter, you are welcome to sit in my space, you are welcome to drink tea and talk and laugh and cry and spill crumbs on the floor. Your children are welcome to drag out toys, to mash their lunch into the sofa, to parade sticky hands up and down hardwood floors.

Why am I making excuses as though I am ordinarily the perfect host and housewife and mother and homemaker? Why am I explaining things away as though they are not the normal. I do sometimes have a messy house, but dishes are less important than my child wanting me to plant raspberries on his tummy. And sweeping floors comes second to a friend who needs an ear to listen. When I am old, will I look back through my life and remember that I didn't always have a perfect home, perfect hair, dust free sills, or will I remember the memories created in the spaces that weren't filled with cleaning and grooming and trying to appear perfect?

So please come in, sit and have some cake, this is my home and it is lived in, and it is loved in.  No explanations. 

Linking up today with the delightful Ruth at ruthpovey.com for the fabulous new 'Letters to' link up!

Letters To


  1. This is lovely, Sabrina! No explanations needed. You and your home sound so welcoming that I long to come over and have tea and cake with you. How perceptive these words are, "will I remember the memories created in the spaces that weren't filled with cleaning and grooming and trying to appear perfct?" As an older woman whose babes are adults now, I can vouch that you won't ever regret time spent with family and friends. I regret my preoccupation with perfection and how hard it was to stop worrying about what others might think of me. The sooner we can break out of that enslavement the better! Blessings :) xx

  2. So very true. I too wish I could come by for a visit. Just the type of home and heart I love to spend time with! Wonderful post.

  3. Sabrina, this post is SO good! I think every mother in the land can relate to this, it's so well written and honest and insightful x

  4. Great post Sabrina, even though I don't have the blessing of children, I often feel the demands to have a super clean house when visitors come, and if I'm having a bad week pain wise, it's just so hard.

    I believe that friends and family come to visit us, not to judge how our homes look. Homes are to be lived in, loved, not to live in a house on a stage with no life seen inside :)

    Time, love is far more important :)

    I would love to visit your lovely home.


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